I have to admit, I wasn't completely sold on the Bible Study I had chosen after the first week. It's a larger group (about 20) that gathers to watch an hour long Beth Moore DVD and then we discuss and pray. I appreciated the idea that it was no homework - the reason why I chose it. However, the group was quite diverse and the hour seemed very long while watching, so I thought I'd give it just one more try.
This week, the first fifteen minutes (as they always are) were devoted to worship with all of the Bible Studies - however, this time Amy W. led the worship. She chose songs I loved and sung them in a key I could access somewhat respectably. A grand start. In addition, a very disabled woman was seated next to me, and watching/listening to her sing, it really struck me just how precious that sound was to God - a little bit like the last penny given by the widow - the work this woman took to get here and participate, how the Heavens rejoice by such an effort.
Down in the room we congregate in, many of the same women returned, which I found very encouraging. One in particular, named Dawn, brings her 4 month old daughter with her, "Callahan". Callahan and I exchanged eye contact last week and it was as if she had magnetic powers that drew me to her. When the DVD begun this week, I actually got up and moved so I could sit next to her - and then, joy of all joys, hold her.
Now, I'm not a huge baby person - UNTIL they start to "connect" with you. Callahan had reached that point - and looking at her - her looking at me, stealing glances to her mommy that she ADORED, and listening to her coos and laughs - that was worship to me. SO PRECIOUS! No, Stephietoo - I'm not more inclined to have another one, but all of a sudden, I can see the merit of being a grandma, when you have that time to devote just to your "love" without the rest of life telling you it needs to be taken care of as well.
So, long story short - I'm sticking with the Bible Study. I truly believe it's where I'm supposed to be.