Surprising Lydia

On Tuesday of this last week, this appeared in my Facebook Messages:

Gretchen Bell

Hey girls...I know this is more than a long shot. But Lydia is coming to Portland Sat morning for her birthday and I thought it would be sooo much fun to surprise her with all of us. I then thought how crazy with life and schedules but I am still throwing it out there. I would love to see you all too. If this doesn't work lets plan a time. It has been a crazy wonderful emotional year. LOVE YOU ALLL. ME

Oh Gretchen.  (aka "ME").  Gretchen is what could only be described as the "ringleader" of my group of closest friends from my days at Western Oregon University - and particularly, our time working together to run Campus Crusade for Christ at our college.  We have tried to keep up and have reunions over the years, but it is so hard to work our schedules in alignment -  so, generally it doesn't happen but every other year.  In fact, it was 18 months ago that we saw each other last - Whitley had just been born, Michele and I met up with them after visiting her at the hospital.  

So, when this message arrived, I think we all just sighed and thought...."For Lydia - can I figure out a way to make this work?".  Lydia is such a faithful and loyal supporter to us all - the idea of surprising her and potentially "making her day" by getting us all together was indeed a huge draw.  

It was obviously a "God thing" to make it all work, as it turned out to be a day that we could all carve out a few hours.  Not a perfect day choice for any of us, but one we could work with.  No one was traveling, no tournaments were taking place - no family priorities - really a rarity and definitely orchestrated by God.

As a result, at 11:15, I met up with Lisa, our friend that lives in Creswell, we carpooled up to meet Michele just out of Salem at 12:15, and we arrived on the dot at 1pm at the Lake Oswego Olive Garden.

Within five minutes, Lydia, Gretchen, and Kelly (and Lydia and Gretchen's daughters) walked around the corner.   I'm seated next to Lydia in the picture on the right, and my carpool buddy, Lisa is seated next to Michele in the pic on the left.

In this group picture, Kelly is on the far left - and the blond is "ME" - (Gretchen)  =)  between Lisa and Michele.  

The couple of hours we spent together was far too short of time to catch up on each other's lives.  We barely got the "Cliff Notes" versions.  But, we got enough to know that with each of our own very unique ways of approaching life, God has softened all of the differences so that now, more than ever, we can relate in ways that are so real, authentic, and transparent.   Not one of us is immune from grieving over the hurts our children have faced, family medical scares, or husbands who have struggled with feeling successful/finding satisfaction in their career.  We all LOVE the Lord, but know more than ever that following Him is not going to be an easy path - though it will always be worth it.

As short as it was, it was my favorite visit yet.  Love these ladies - and am so thankful for the friendships that have lasted for over 22 years.  Happy Birthday Lydia - and thanks for being the reason we all made time for each other!

Showering Elaina in Love

So, I have a very sweet story to tell.  A love story.  An unconventional love story that couldn't have been written for a better person. 

The heroine in this story is Elaina.  I met her in the year prior to our Bible Study and she fit the "profile" we were looking for when starting our group - so we extended an invite.  I had spent a lot more time with her younger sister Sarah, so I found myself surprised as I got to know Elaina.  She looks a lot like her sister.  But Elaina is an "old soul" - as kind and gentle and compassionate as can be - and a classic introvert.  (Sarah is a lot more boisterous and outgoing, but equally as sweet!) She admits that she literally squeals when she gets to go to bed every night - and is so very content to spend her post work hours with just a candle burning and a good book.  (Not even a tv going....wow!).  Her job is the perfect fit for her as well.  She's a nurse - and I'm sure every hospital patient she visits literally sighs when she walks into a room as her spirit is so soothing and comforting.  

With all that said, though - Elaina's life hasn't fallen into place in exactly the way she'd always dreamed of as a little girl.  Choices made by her father just as she reached adulthood were crushing.  A boyfriend that her family didn't approve of was hard to let go.  She came in to our study very heavy-hearted and cautious.  She's someone so easy to love, but she is so careful in how she exposes her heart.  It didn't help that she was living away from her mom, away from her sisters and brothers.  She went back and forth with what she thought God might be wanting her to do - because, living alone in bleak and unwelcoming Eugene was not a a balm to her heart.  

It was hard watching her hurt.  She longed for God to bring a husband in to her life - and yet, no doors opened.  Instead, the gloom was overwhelming.  Summers were better, but Elaina realized that especially once she hit winter-time, she was merely "going through the motions".  Eventually, over a year ago, through encouragement within our group and an actual intervention from her family members, Elaina sought out a doctor.  She was prescribed an SSRI (like Lexapro) and it literally changed her life.  Her story is very similar to mine in that it was that profound of a change - an obvious chemical lacking in her brain that medicine was able to fix.  Elaina became alive again - and not just when it was sunny outside.

Within months (maybe even weeks) - figuring out what God had in store for her future wasn't as much as a priority for her as simply embracing each day that He gave her.  She found an apartment in a sweet little community (close to us, yay!!) - and found her peace.  It was a transformation we all got to see unfold and it brings tears to my eyes just thinking of it as it was something we'd all longed for her to have, but beyond our prayers, there was so little we could do to help her get there.  She came to Bible Study opening up, sharing her profound insight, and giggling....oh, to hear Elaina's giggle...there's very little to compare with the infectious joy it brings.  

Then, in September, she mentioned this guy's name - "Brad".  His family lived near her family when they were kids.  His mom actually led her mom to the Lord.  They are an amazing family.  She hadn't seen him since she attended a wedding in high school - and barely remembered what he looked like.  But, somehow they had started connecting via the internet.  Emails started picking up in frequency.  He lived in Michigan and suggested visiting Oregon - and not just for the beautiful scenery.  Pretty soon, Elaina was planning a week with Brad - a guy she still hadn't seen a picture of (not on Facebook) - and even bought our Duck/Utah tickets and borrowed gear to attend a game with him when he was here.  That was October.  And, actually, on the very day of that game - her whole "game" plan changed - it became clear that they would be much more than email pen pals.  Brad asked Elaina's mom for her blessing of marriage before her returned to Michigan by the end of that week.

The next time they saw each other was the day after Christmas.  She flew out to meet his family.  And, while she was there - they took a horse-led carriage ride amidst snow falling down and he presented a ring to her and asked her to be his wife.

She will see him again next week when he uses his ONE-WAY ticket to fly to Oregon.  And, two days after Valentine's Day, they'll be married.  It will be a small, family-only ceremony - and then they'll spend a short honeymoon in Hawaii.  He'll then move in to her apartment with her and they'll be "one".  

Oh, I know, so much could be said of how crazy this is - what kind of person would advice this and think it's a wise choice?   Well, I would, and I have.   It's almost more "Biblical" than most relationships I've seen unfold, in that their parents have watched them both and know what a match they are.  There lives have been laid out there, exposed to in depth to the family and friends and siblings that have surrounded them, and can vouch for them.  So, pretty much, if the attraction and compatibility really are there (which they definitely are)- then it comes down to making a decision to stick with it for life.  I love that.  Let's face it.  Marriage is hard - but, we don't get to give up on hard - we work through it.  For them, I am happy that the doubting and wondering gets to be taken off the table.  They are diving in, in (GOOD) faith - and will grow together - working out the kinks in tandem and not losing any days to the sometimes pointless time period of "waiting" just to be able to "make sure" and plan a wedding.  I'm on board, Brad and Elaina. It's not many people I could say that to, but for you two - I'm so on board.  (And, for sure, the families are too!)

You can only imagine the giddy enthusiasm our Thursday Night Life Group has responded with.  We are so beyond happy for Elaina.  Perhaps a little bummed that we aren't going to get to witness the exchange of her vows, but this is really just perfect for her, and none of us would change it a bit.

So, in light of that, it was especially important that we "shower" her with love with a shower.  Her birthday is also on February 5th - so she's getting a lot of love from us.  Kaela did a phenomenal job planning it from start to finish - and worked it out so that we could all contribute in one manner or another to make it her night just as special as it could be in honor of this girl we have all fallen in love with.

She knew something was up - we had to reserve the night.  But, she didn't know the extent - who was involved or what the night would look like.  

The first surprise was seeing us in the parking lot at Oakway Mall and being draped by Heather with a "Bride to Be" sash. 

We then walked into Sabai Restaurant - her favorite - and all these ladies were here for her.  The gal sitting between Kaela and myself on the right is Kara - a friend since childhood to Elaina - and the look-alike to Elaina on the left (closest) is Sarah.  If it weren't for that very curly hair vs. very straight - you would really do a double take, despite the three year's difference.  The rest of the group is our TNL.

Following dinner, Sarah and Kara did a brief bit of shopping with Elaina while we put the food out and final touches on the Bridal Shower spread at my house.  Kaela and Christi did such an outstanding job of making it so classy and beautiful.  Just like Elaina.  

Then, she walked through the door and found everyone waiting to keep celebrating her.

We dove into the food, and had her open presents.  We go to ask a "Hot Seat" question when she chose to open the gift we provided (as dirty as we wanted, which was pretty darn PG when all was said and done) and then after she opened the present we got to tell her what we loved most about her.  It was PERFECT, and I think, the most relaxed and enjoyable shower I've ever attended.

 Along the way, Heather recorded each of her comments and exclamations as she opened the presents to be read aloud later in the theme of "What Elaina will say on her wedding night".  I was sitting next to Heather throughout and found myself cracking up with her when something really odd was said....just perfect!!!

Finally, Elaina was presented with a book Kaela put together with a letter each of us had written to Elaina and previously sent to Kaela to compile along with pictures of us over the years.  It was priceless and had Heather choked up reading it next to me knowing she'll be leaving us all behind in May to move to Boston. 

Some of these life changes fill my heart with so much joy, and some leave such a hole.  But, that's a topic I'm not ready to address yet - shouldn't have even brought it up.  So, let's just keep the focus on Elaina - and rejoice in this love story written just for her by God.  The night was ended with a group prayer for her - and then this picture.  Sigh....so sweet....the prologue to the "Happily Ever After" set before her.

Whitley in January

Whitley has definitely hit her "toddler" stage.  She is a fast little walker, but she definitely wobbles - so cute to see her!   She picks up several new words a day - but definitely has her own vocabulary terms from her own language for things too.  Steph has helped to translate a lot of them (or I've figured it out), but there's still some mysteries.  Last night, we were all puzzled by "Soma" - the best we can come up with is "Baby Einstein Videos" (vs. "Dona" meaning "Dora", or "Choo Choo" as "Choo Choo Soul").  And, then, there's lots of talking where we know she has something to say, but there's no translation.  She gets her point across, though - more and more every day.  

One thing that's no mystery is her love for the play areas at the malls - particularly this one with the slide.  Love these expressions.

Unfortunately, adjacent to, but outside the "protected" play area, are little pay-to-ride-on gizmos.  She's constantly trying to escape and get in these now.

Not sure if you noticed the barrettes in the picture, but it's become my new fixation.  Just can't get over the cute-quotient of these little animal barrettes.  So, it's my fault that Whitley now thinks barrettes or hair bows are called "Owl" and making the "hooooo" sound.  (Which leads to the age-old question when we put the fox barrettes in...."What does the fox say?"  ;)   )

We also got a visit in to see Mikayla's girl friends, when I had to pick Mikayla up early the other day from school.  She's a hit. 

 

Unfortunately, not every part of every day brings smiles.  Whitley has recently discovered the joys of "bouncy-bouncy" (trampoline) and "ouside" (being outside).  It BREAKS HER HEART when she can't go out there.   She'll go to the door and just cry and wail.  On days like the one in this picture when it is raining and in the 40's, there's just not an option.  Sorry, sweetheart...how about a bath instead?  (The video that accompanied this pic, not shown due to missing clothing - was so sad and pathetic....she just couldn't understand why she was being denied).

So, when it is NOT raining (even between cloudbursts - and even when it's chilly) - I try to indulge her.  Even when 45 minutes goes on and we're still out there, it's really not a bad gig.  She's self-contained, happy, moving, getting fresh air - and I'm either exercising along with her, or relaxing along side of her.  If she's going to be obsessed with doing something - there's a whole lot worse she could choose!

Also, last week, we got a visit in to see Heather.  She works at the same place as Nancy, so we peeked in to see her too.  It was a hoot (pun intended....note her outfit) - I think Whit could have run down the hallways playing peek-a-boo with Heather's office mates all day.

 

This last Thursday, Kaela came in to town - and yes, we chose to have our catch-up conversation on the trampoline.

Later, Whit got to visit Mikayla's volleyball practice.  Again, hard to get her to leave.  "Baaaaalllll!"

Finally, on Friday, Christi came over to help Kaela (and I) decorate for Elaina's surprise bridal shower that evening.  Whit had a rough go of it all that afternoon, but after some Advil to help with her obvious teething (a constant stream of drool from that girl this last week) - she came around by the end of the day.  (Huge kudos to my teenage boy who whisked her off for fun times as soon as he walked through the door from school....times like that I chant again and again to him, "You're my hero, Brayden, you're my hero, Brayden!")  At one point, Christi's little Elsie woke up and Whitley was very interested in tending to the little baby.  She put her binkie in, "stimulated her" by playing with the carseat toys, and worked on buckling.  We used the word "Gentle" a lot, but largely, she showed signs of capabilities of being a very good big sister... Something to think about, Travis and Steph!  =)

To My Faithful Blog Readers...

I utter a sincere apology for my obvious absence.  There have been a few blog-worthy events that have transpired (my hubby's birthday!!!) - and trust me, they will be documented.

However, on any given weekday, my typing on the computer is like a catnip to a kitty for Whitley.  The other day, when I needed to get something done for a deadline, I literally had my phone on one "Dora" show and my Kindle on a "Baby Einstein" show - with her on my lap - to keep her from needing to be on the computer. 

So, catch up time needs to happen on weeknights or weekends - and sometimes, by the time that time arrives, I'd really rather just chill and be lazy. 

I will get caught up, I promise.  In the meantime, I just wanted to assure you all that we're still alive and kickin' - and already to the final day of January!  Woo hoo...and good riddance!  

Hope your Friday is a happy one....and February starts off full of joy!