Slow Grieving

This computer loss, as I suspected, will be a painful, long-term, process. Daily, I discover things that are gone now, that I had once thought were safe and secure - and mine to turn to and use, or re-look at, anytime I wanted to. Things like: our address labels, camping lists, special letters, and then, of course, the pictures.

It was with a sense of panic just now, that I just pulled out the hard-drive, that we had just bought - and had yet to transfer my "full" photo library over to. John had, however, and I was hoping - and believing, that the very special 4th of July family picture that we took was on it. Of course, I never uploaded it onto the blog, because it was that good - a fluke - that we were planning on using it for our Christmas picture. As far as we can tell, it is gone. I downloaded it onto my computer, and I'm not sure if John ever retrieved the photos to his.....

I have yet to cry over this whole ordeal, but right now I'm tempted. Those stupid, self-centered people have no idea what kind of pain they cause families when they steal a computer just for the sake of downloading $200 worth of explicit songs from I-tunes - and the cost of the computer. It is pointless, ruthless, and all too common. I've got to think they're probably not more than ten years older than my son, and I just wish I could have ten minutes with them strapped to a chair, forced to listen, while I gave them a piece of my mind - and perhaps a taste of grace too - because, with song choices such as those, I have to believe their lives have not been filled with an abundance of "true" love.

But, in the meantime, I feel like having a pity-party. I'm angry and sad and very disappointed. Of course, this whole thing could have been so much worse, but knowing my computer is probably being stripped or handed off to some other punk - with all of my library of precious family photos and i-tunes filled with Christian music - it just makes my heart hurt.